Bugs, Heat, Bears, Oh My!

So, you must be wondering (here I go assuming again) about what we have been doing in the last few days.  Well, as the title of this blog post suggests, we have been enjoying life, while trying desperately to avoid Nebraskan killer bugs, hide from an oppressive heat wave, and scare off the many bears we have come in contact with (more about that later).  

Let's start with the killer bugs shall we.  Allow us to introduce you to the worst bug in the world:

Eeeek! (Sorry, didn't mean to scream).  This is the fabled Midwest Poisonous Grasshopper.  They reside mostly in Nebraska (imagine our joy).  Apparently, when these grasshoppers feel threatened, they secrete a toxic mucous which is surprisingly deadly for their size.  While there have been no fatalities reported yet this year, there as been one case of complete, irreversible paralysis reported in McCook (only about an hour away).  To our joy, there is a colony (family? group? gang? let's say gang), a gang of these Midwest Grasshoppers whose home is the garden right in front of our front door.  We have to scan for these guys before going in or out.  We think one touched Nina at some point.  It would explain her swelled-up ankles...

Did we get you?  Probably not, but it was worth a shot.  No, the grasshoppers around our apartment are not Midwest Poisonous Grasshoppers (a breed I just made up, creative name though right?); they are simply grasshoppers.  Gross, scaly, jumpy grasshoppers.  And while they may not be poisonous, they are super gross (which we think is just as bad).

Hold the blog!  We have a breaking bulletin.  As we are writing this blog, we seriously just spotted a lady bug exploring Brian's arm.

(Actual size)

A freaken' (excuse our language) lady bug!  Excuse us one moment while we get rid of it.  Outside.  You didn't think we would kill it would you?  Who knows, it could have been the lady bug from A Bug's Life.  It's possible....

Where were we?  (To do list: find an app that will let readers answer all of my rhetorical questions).  Ah yes, bugs in Nebraska= gross.  Okay, next topic, Nebraskan heat.  Sorry to all you High Desertans (Desertites?) out there, but

Our heat is hotter than your heat!  Granted, you may win on a simple thermometer, but once humidity,

(apparently, we like our thermometers in Celsius because we are just that cool, or European, one of the two)

...yes, humidity, our sticky, overwhelming friend is factored in: we win.  Why buy a pool in Nebraska, when you can go outside, do a few (and I'm talking like three, not thirty) jumping jacks, and have your own pool, free of charge?  

Yes, just like this.

You must be wondering about the bears.  Well, to make the Wizard of Oz reference work, I had to keep bears in the title.  Sorry, no bear stories from us.  At least not yet...

Reading over this blog post, we hope you do not get the wrong impression.  We are having a blast!

(opps, this is a blast from the past, ignore this picture. What tie dye shirt picture?  Why would that be in a post about bugs and heat?)

Nebraskans are by far the nicest people we have ever met (as a whole, collective, "hey, how you doing? Want the shirt off my back?" bunch of friendly people).  Of course, you, yes, you, reader with the smile on your face (if you don't have a smile on, I'm not talking to you apparently), are very friendly too.  But, to do a quick generalization:

Nebraskans = Nice people

We give them two thumbs way up

That's right, there are happy faces on those thumbs.  Because even the thumbs that go way up are happy to be in Nebraska.  Those faces look familiar.  Hmmm...if you had to decide, which one is Brian & which one is Nina?  Sorry, lost focus.  Nebraskans= nice people. 

Let us leave you with a question to ponder:

Nebraskans = ?

(hint, we've hidden the answer somewhere above)

Until Next Time...